Tips On Visiting Friends And Relatives
Advice For Families

Who Should Visit?

Anyone who was important to the resident outside the facility should visit him or her in the nursing home, children included. Young children rarely react negatively to aging or sick individuals. On the other hand, teenagers and older children may need some time to adjust. Staff members, particularly social workers, can be helpful in aiding this process.

Planning for the Visit

Some people feel that they don't know what to do during a visit to a nursing home. In this case, simply ask yourself what activities you enjoyed with this person outside the nursing home. Did you listen to music together? Did you play cards? Did you watch old movies? There is no reason you can't continue to share these same activities in the facility. There are also many other activities that you can try to help make visits rich and interesting:

  • One idea which is always very therapeutic is to bring the family pet to the nursing home. The benefits to the elderly of contact with animals are widely acknowledged. Seeing the family pet would be especially uplifting. Be sure to contact the administrator in advance to make arrangements.
  • If you videotape family events-graduation ceremonies, little league games, school plays-make arrangements to show the videos to the resident if he or she cannot attend these events. This will give him or her a better sense of contact with family and the outside world. Showing the resident family photographs will serve the same purpose.
  • Treat a female resident to a manicure or fix her hair. This sort of physical contact is very important to the nursing home resident. Your acknowledgement of her concerns about her physical appearance will mean a great deal as well.
  • Elderly people often have difficulty writing letters. You can have a very productive visit by taking dictation from the resident. The resident will most certainly receive mail in return, which he or she will cherish more than you can imagine.
  • If the resident is a fan of games, bring along your checkers or chess set, scrabble board, or deck of cards

If you're ever at a loss for ideas, check with the facility's activity director. He will likely provide you with a whole list of ideas and possibly materials with which to work.

A special note-conjugal visits also are important. Two people who have lived together for years are entitled to private visits without intrusion. For any home that is certified for Medicaid and/or Medicare, the Residents' Bill of Rights protects the right of conjugal visits, unless otherwise ordered by a physician.

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